Suspension of Disbelief

September 01, 2018:

The Juggernaut Returns. The Plastic Man… Plastics.

Gramercy Park

Um. It got Juggernaut'd.

Characters

NPCs: None.

Mentions:

Plot:

Mood Music: [*\# None.]


Fade In…

It's a typical afternoon here in The Big Apple with the usual mixed gathering of bikers, roller bladers, park goers, and other assorted happenings near and around Gramercy Park. It's business as usual with people going on about their routines, entertainments and other mindless activities that don't require much thought or alarm. Your basic 'Everyday is just the same'.

Just the same meaning that a happening such as a sudden flash of red light not far from Madison Square Park is taken in stride at first. When the red light turns into a crackle of crimson energy and begins spreading tendrils of magical force that seem to shatter the air itself as if it were glass..okay -now- people begin getting nervous and start scattering. The air buckles and distorts as if some monumental force was breaking through.

The ground begins to shake as well, causing those near the disturbance to trip and stumbles, cars to swerve and honk, and cracks to spread through the streets as the earth shudders and then lurches once, twice and then again. Almost as if some impossible physical force were repeatedly pressing against it with shoves and stomps.

So okay maybe not so typical.

*

Ah. Gramercy Park. Home of the Dog Walkers, Bikers and… Yoga.

There's benefits to sitting on a bench on the other side of the wall of bushes where a group of divorcees and business moms are getting in their hot yoga sessions. Benefits that a man in a red leotard holding a newspaper couldn't possibly know about. Especially since he has no head!

Okay, that's a lot of neck. A lot of neck that's stretched all the way through the bushes and is poking out the other side, behind the yoga class. At the end of the neck is a bird. A robin, actually, if we're going to get specific. It's perched on a thin branch within the bushy area and is just watching all these downward facing dog positions. The slightest bit of drool coming from its beak.

Then the ground starts shaking and the yoga class starts vacating and that ruins all the robin's fun. When the view's over (because birds love to see 'em leave) the robin disappears back into the bushes and as it comes out the other side, the newspaper's dropped and the Pliable Paladin appears in all of his glory.

IT'S PLASTIC MAN!

"Alright! That's it! This is last time somebody interrupts my bird watchin'!"

Plastic Man rolls up his sleeves, which just kind of pushes his arms up and they roll right back down to the fists he's just made. But he doesn't move besides to stand in front of the bench he was just sitting on.

Hm. He has no idea who he's going to hit.

*

With a sound like glass shattering and a rumble like a blast of thunder, the air fractures apart as an absolutely enormous torso comes smashing through. An immense figure swatched in crackling red energy that surges around it and gradually parts and peels back like a curtain of electical energy to reveal the immensity of the body of The Juggernaut.

Behind the behemoth is a swirling vortex of red cyclone like energy which burrows like a tunnel into the ethers of some otherworldly realm and a blast of heat scorches the ground as the goliath steps forward, literally shattering the walls between dimensions in the process, to impose a gigantic Juggernaut shaped footprint into the concrete of the streets and shake the area from his footsteps, Seismeters going off for blocks as Manhattan lurches from the goliaths weight and strength.

Needless to say, cars swerve, crashing into each other, fire hydrants burst open and windows crack. Camera phones are out and a clickin' away and bystanders alternate between the occasional shouts, screams and gasps of astonishment. For his part, The Juggernaut - practically the size of the front of a small store, takes no particular notice of anyone in particular and instead blinks a few times and then lifts his massive fingers to his helmeted head in a thoughtful chin grasping gesture though he can't actually touch his chin.

"Huh. New York." he rumbles while tapping his helmet slightly.

A car swerves and careens, crashing full bore into the side of Juggernaut's legs. The front of the car crumples, compressing like an accordian almost up to where the driver sits. Juggernaut doesn't even move or seem to notice.

*

"HALT!"

Plastic Man has taken the form of a Police Officer in a red uniform and stands right in front of the Juggernaut. Probably not his best idea but then again he doesn't even have any good ideas. Ever. Especially when it comes to sticking his nose where it doesn't belong.

His extended arm is longer than it should be and his hand is in the shape of a HUGE stop sign. His other hand is being used for a whistle. Which he blows. Loudly. Loud enough to cause some serious ear damage to anyone close enough to be annoyed. Okay, not actual damage but it's freakin' loud, okay?

"You're currently violating obesity code 2-FA-T.4-NY-C. I'm going to have to ask you to vacate these premises in a timely and orderly fashion."

Plas spots the Juggernaut's get up for the first time. "… and make a pitstop at the mall because that outfit is violating every other law known to man. Ew. Where'd you dig that outfit up? The Badwill?"

*

"…Yeah this is New York alright…"

Juggernaut's deep voice rumbles with heavy annoyance as he rolls his eyes and then allows a slight smirk to crease his expression. It's a tight smile though. Not at all friendly but clearly strained as he lowers his hand from his chin and lets his massive arms hang at his sides.

"You the local good guy or something? Cute." He twitches lightly at the insults and simply raises his right arm up. "What're you talking about, red? YOu calling me fat? This is all muscle." He flexs the upraised arm, balling up a massive fist and bulging a huge veined bicep the size of a buick up, peaking at the same level of his clenched fist. Veins the size of firehoses standing out in stark relief on the hairy flesh as he coils the fist backwards almost like a spring winding up.

"I'd forgive you cause you're obviously blind or something but..well.. you just insulted my outfit to and together that's just unfergivable." He swivels at the waist now, rearing back and seemingly swelling up even larger with an ominous sound of sinew and muscle fiber creaking and the ground compressing slightly from his pressure. "So hold still. I'm afraid I'm gonna have to give you a taste of my Sunday Punch!"

*

"Well, actually, I'm not. I'm not even from here. I just came here to see the sights. And by sights, I ain't talkin' 'bout the Statue of Liberty, if you know what I'm sayin'."

All the way through Plastic Man's rambling he's pretty busy turning from the police officer back into his normal (ha!) self. Although, he does make it a point to swell himself up as big as the Juggernaut is. "Oh yeah? Well two can play that game, Biggie Talls!"

Plastic Man starts muscling himself up to Juggernaut levels and even folds the same weird looking outfit and helmet onto his face and body at the same time. "Yeah! Look at me! I'm big! I'm strong! I'm annoying! I'm—"

KRAK-OWWWW!

That word doesn't even do it justice but the moment that fist connects with the helmeted face and chin of the Plasternaut, his head goes first and then the rest of his body is slung right after him. It's like a mission to mars or something with the way Plastic Man becomes a non-park-entity in record time. Sailing right into the air and off like a damn rocket or something because that thing is ouuuuuuutttttta heeeeeeeeere!

Still going! Still going! GONE!

Kind of.

*

Doppleganger. Great. That probably made Cain put a -little- more into that punch then he was first intending. It wasn't exactly a kill shot or a 'I'm tusslin' with The Green-Scar Hulk after a ragequit from a game' level of strength..but Juggernaut operates on a 'If you can't take it, you shouldn't have asked for it' level when it comes to his swings so the fact that he just sent this faker hurtling across the skyline and shattered windows up and down the street from the impact is..more then a little satisfying.

"PUNK." he shouts as he brings his fist back down..knowing full well Plastic Man probably couldn't hear that. But hey that's satisfying as well. "..I can't stand shapeshifters or being mocked. Grease stain.."

With that he turns and starts to step forward, moving with added intensity and fury due to his boiling temper. *TOOOM* *TOOOM* thunder his footfalls. A whole car flattens under foot as he treads across it with all the difficulty of someone stepping across stepping stones. Juggernaut sized footprints left in that, the streets and then more. The ground violently shaking with his footsteps as he searches out an exit path while leaving a swatch of destruction behind him.

*

Fwipfwipfwipfwipfwipfwip!

That's the sound that's headed back towards the Juggernaut with a speed that's much faster than it actually should be moving at. The red boomerang with the yellow and black stripes across the middle comes speeding in at the Juggernaut at a whopping TOO MANY miles an hour.

It doesn't exactly matter where the impact happens because the moment it collides with him, the boomerang expands like an explosion, body stretching out to beyond the size of the Juggernaut's current state and seeks to envelope him in a big ol' red ball of annoying stretchy superhero that's probably going to need a lot more therapy after this.

"Nyyyyyyah! What's up, Crock?" The Plastic Man's face is on the outside because he doesn't want to get punched in it but he's certainly wondering if he can't use his body to protect the cars and road from this big JugLug's stompalicious tirade.

… This is probably just going to piss him off more, isn't it?

*

Oh yes. Yes it does.

"Mropgher Fclkcrrr!!!" roars Juggernaut's muffled voice, nice, safe and distorted so the little children nearby don't have their sensitive little hurts blasted by the behemoths angry swearing. He just doesn't know what to make of this and it indeed has the success of causing him to stop moving forward out of sheer shock and surprise and..to instead begin stumbling about in wild frantic frenetic directions that send him rolling into whatever random piece of scenery happens to be to close to him as he grapples with the the annoying stretchy red ball attempting to imprison him. Rolling about like a wrecking ball attempting to be contained. It's like the worst sort of Bouncy House ride or a nightmarish version of falling into one of those pools filled with multi colored balls.

Eventually the giant stops his stumbling and fuming and instead spreads his arms as wide as he can and then claps them together in a trick used all to often by Hulk, but unfortunantely not patened by him so others of like strength can get use out of it as well. The thunderous impact might have its sound muffled by Plastic Man - but the expanding shockwave now rolls against the interior of the ball, seeking escape with all the force of a Hulk level thunderclap behind it.

*

Plastic Man can only hold onto himself for so long. He was already starting to lose his grip from the frantic powerful rummaging around that was going on inside. In fact, he even managed to poke a head inside of himself to say, "Stop that." But then he pulled it back out just as quickly.

Again, he doesn't want to get hit in the face. Again. It's still hurting from the first time and he can make whatever part of himself be his face that he wants. So yeah. Ow.

He's in the middle of thinking up some kind of quip when there's a lull in Juggermovement. Only to have himself thunderously sent sailing into the air by the thunderclap of Juggstice!

Again, he's sailing far, far away.

"I see you are a worthy opponent, Hugerman!" Wait, why does he sound like a Shakespearean Asgardian. And why does his silhouette look buffer and with more flapping cape action and why is one hand spinning around wildly. This is a lot to take in from a distance. So the Plastic Man decides to give Juggernaut a closer look.

That spinning hand comes to a halt, pointing in the direction of the Juggernaut but at the expense of Plastic Thor being slingshotted in his direction. His hand is now a gigantic replica of Mjolnir. And by giant, we definitely mean the size of Juggernaut.

"FOR NARNIAAAAAAAAAAA!"

*

He's disorientated and possibly very disgusted as well. I mean, he was just trapped by this guy's body. That's disturbing on many levels unless you're, like, The Blob.

Juggernaut shakes his head, the ringing caused by being stuck at ground zero of his own shockwave for more then normally intended having disorientated him but he's able to get himself back together again as he hears the cry of Plastic Thor and straighten up just in time to see him hurtling in his direction..

Well now..that time has come. The time all secret Juggernaut fans look forward to. That phrase..that ultimate phrase. "Don't you know who I am—??" He straightens to his full height, vast chest spread wide and huge physique basically swamping the entire street with it's immensity ..and he just basically 'lets' Plastic-Thor hit him, allowing the oversized hammer to blow right into an oustretched arm that bulges bigger with a surge of flexed strength. The impact blows trees down, tosses cars in every direction and forms a huge sinkhole around the giant.

Juggernaut doesn't even move from where he stands and doesn't even blink. "I'M THE JUGGERNAUT!" he roars while attempting to slam Plastic Man into the ground in a motion like cracking a whip.

"Nothing on this planet is stronger then me! Nothin' can stop me! I was stuck in a dimension after some magical do-hickey zapped me there - and I was just wantin' to go get a beer to celebrate bein' back home. But you..I wanna stomp your goofy face into th'ground!"

*

"You-"

CRACK!

"Just-"

SMACK!

"Wanted—"

SPLAT!

"— A FREAKING BEER?!"

Plastic Man's been manhandled a lot before but this takes the cake. And also makes him a pancake.

On one of his rises up he pops out two arms to make a 'T' with his hands. "Time Out!"

Plastic Man shakes his flattened face back to normal and keeps his hands where Juggernaut can see them. "Hey, listen. I know what its like to want a beer. And I think I know just the place. But you gotta' do me a favor, man. You're as big as my mother-in-law." Plas cracks a goofy faced smile. "Is there /any/ chance you can like… de-huge-ify? Cuz this place just got renovated and I don't wanna' send the poor owner down that road again."

Plastic Man goes for something that most people don't try anymore. Talking.

"Second round on me?"

*

Juggernaut's boulder sized fist hovers overhead, shaking violently as he restrains it, like a asteroid that's somehow been grabbed and is strugglign to break free. It covers Plastic Man in shadow as the rest of the giant looms just infront of the poised impact. His arm shakes as if some great internal war was happening. To smash or not to smash..

It seems 'not to smash' has won over and 'reason' stops The Juggernaut. He lowers the sequioa like arm and just glares at Plastic Man for a few seconds before saying. "Well..yeah I mean..eventually I was going to go get one. I just got back from some part of the Crimson Cosmos. I haven't had a beer in ages… Time passes differently there.. Feels like it's been longer then it's actually been from the looks of it."

He snorts at the request to de-hugify though, "I aint giving away all my secrets or tricks! The name's Juggernaut! Not..not…Skinny guy in red armor! Just stay outta my way and nobody's gotta get hurt."

Looks like that's about as much of a compromise as he's going to give. But at least he's not trying to smash Plastic Man into the ground or deliberately tearing the area up.

The behemoth waits, looking to see if Plastic Man takes the 'offer' such as it is.

*

"Alright, alright! Whatever you say, Biggie Talls."

Plastic Man decides to just keep being annoying. Before he swirls himself down into a slithery and slippery superhero and slides right out of whatever grip the Juggernaut thought he might've had on the elastical idiot!

As he slithers away like a snake, he pops back up as both Bill and Ted, offering the most bodacious hand sign of all time.

"Catch ya' later, royal fat dude!" And then they both fold back down into the Plastic Man, he sproings, boings and GONGS! Right over something or other and off into the distance!

Offer taken?

*

"..I think I hate that guy." is Juggernauts response. His eyes are narrowed and his mouth flattened into a deadpan expression of true annoyance and dour disappointment. "..I really, really, don't like him."

But enough is enough. He's been delayed long enough that the arrival of a team like The Avengers or even The X-Men just might be enough to put him down or at least restrain him long enough to prove problematic. He takes off into a thundering run, keeping his word enough to avoid running into traffic though Juggernaut sized foot-imprints persist.

Eventually he leaps. The ground lurches violently as he sails up and up and up into the air, towards the roof of the nearest towering building. By some miracle or careful application of his own strength - or both - the building shudders but sustains his impact..and then he leaps again! The massive force sending him rocketing across the skyline. He's no Hulk. He's not crossing the city in super sonic speeds but Juggernaut has leapt to knock down titans before. Such a leap as this is an easy task. Before long he's crossed the city and is taking a plunge into the East River. Not needing to breath makes under water escapes an easy enough method of disappearing.

*

And right there, in that nasty East River, is a red and yellow clownfish. With a weird black and yellow diamond shape on the back fins. It stops short as the Juggernaut nauts past, turns around to look at nobody and raises a fin to make a 'shhhhh' motion. And just like that, it swims off after that big ol' hunk of mystical mettle.

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