Doctors Are the Worst Patients

February 02, 2018:

Doctor Alyse treats Doctor Alice after a run-in with the Joker.

Legion Hospital

Characters

NPCs: None.

Mentions:

Plot:

Mood Music: [*\#https://youtu.be/hWWsfrfq69A A little goofy]


Fade In…

Log Resumed: 07-Feb-18 02:28AM EST

*

Alice own groan comes at the same time the clutch grinds it's protest of rough treatment by the driver. Alice's eyes open and she blinks several time as she stares at the roof of the truck. Then she turns her head, silent as a mouse, to look at the irritated Caitlin driving the truck. The helmet is still on her chest and she lifts her head slightly, grasping it in her bare hands, to peer at it before she sits up. "Do you have any ibuprofen, dear?" She asks in her cultured English accent. "Because electrocution sucks," She adds as if that wasn't obvious, rubbing at her brow.

*

Caitlin glances at Alice in the rearview mirror, a little surprised to hear her speaking. "I don't, I'm sorry," Caitlin says, shaking her head. She glances in the mirror again, then looks around the cab for a second. The glove box is opened and shut, then the console is checked.

"Oh, here you go. Aspirin. I don't have any water, I'm sorry," she says. She passes back the aspirin. Her tone is a little low, and one might take her embarrassment as being surly if it wasn't for the thin press of her lips. She's clearly not happy with this whole situation.

"I don't have any water though, I'm sorry," she adds, a second later.

*

Log Edit: Delete last line of previous pose.

*

Alice takes a moment to secure her seatbelt as Caitlin digs around the cab. "Thank you," She says with the kind of tone that says it isn't any small headache. She takes the bottle, fingers brushing against Caitlin's briefly, and then sits back. All it takes is a touch. A touch to change a little bit of her blood into a low dose of sodium barbitol, commonly known as Truth Serum. "I can dry swallow," She says with a little smirk, tossing it back and swallowing.
"You're Fairchild, right? One of the Justice League?" She asks curiously as she leans back, holding the helmet in her lap.

*

Caitlin glances in the mirror at Alice again. "Yeah, that's me," she says, a little tight-lipped with uncertainty. She's not sure she trusts Alice and she's pretty sure she shouldn't be talking to someone who might be a prisoner or worse, a wolf in sheep's clothing.

But, the woman seems friendly enough. Caitlin blinks a few times as her blood pressure drops, and she relaxes back into the seat behind her a little more readily.

*

Alice just sits quietly for a few seconds before leaning forward to peer at the GPS. "Mmmmmm…not much further. I'd offer to have you come in for a nightcap, but we're trying to maintain appearances," She says and sighs, leaning back into her own seat, eyes a little distant and sad. "Do you enjoy being a hero?" She asks after a moment of quiet. "Does it make you happy?"

*

"I do kind of stand out," Caitlin concedes, with a little note of wry self-deprecation. The ginger had at least pulled civilian clothing on over her green leotards; baggy cargo pants, a much-loved pink hoodie that looks almost worn through in places. With her hair pulled back in a thick ponytail held with a black scrunchie, she could almost pass for normal if she weren't crammed so deep into the seat. It's as far back as it'll go, and she still looks cramped.

"I like being a hero," she says, answering the question. "I always wanted to be one. I mean, I wanted to be one as far back as I can remember," she amends. "I can't imagine doing anything else with my life."

Her eyes flicker to the rearview mirror. "You're a chemist, right? Is that what you always wanted to do?"

*

Alice smiles in amusement and her eyes turn from looking out the window to Caitlinn. "Oh…no. When I was young all I wanted to be was a good wife and mother, providing heirs for my husband," She says with a chuckle. "But those were different times. I didn't discover my love of chemistry till I was about…twenty five? And then it was love, yes. There is always something new to discover."
"When I was doing the hero thing we didn't have as many fancy gadgets as there are now. I imagine that makes it a little easier. GPS, cell phones, and the alien technology," She prattles on, her voice low and meant to be calm and soothing. "But even so…there's never an end to it. Always someone new commiting atrocities," She sighs and looks back out the window, leaning her head against the cool glass. "Do you work with the Bat often?"

*

Caitlin's pupils, unbeknownst to her, start to contract again and her blood pressure is going back to normal levels. She shifts in the truck's seat, feeling more alert than she had moments before as her metabolism normalizes. Whatever talents the redhead has, she seems to have shrugged off the barbitol in minutes, instead of what would normally be hours.

"Not very often," she says, her voice a little clipped again. "He stays in Gotham, and he doesn't like people in his area of operations. I'm kinda surprised he asked me to come to the interrogation at all," she says, frankly. "But I don't think anyone has a handle on why Batman does anything, 'cept for Batman."

She hits the turn signal, slows down, and rounds a corner. Caitlin drives with boring predictabilty; she yields at intersections and comes to a complete stop at all the traffic signs.

*

Alice purses her lips as she watches Caitlinn from behind. The shift in tension makes her smirk a little but it's to herself and she doesn't say anything. "Huh…wonder why. I lift weights, but nothing in your class," She says with a chuckle, meaning it as a compliment. "Though your company is better than his, that's for sure. Ah! See that driveway there? It's the back drive onto my property. I can walk the mile from here if you want to drop me here?" She points up ahead, leaning forward again, some 1000 feet, giving the driver plenty of time to stop. "It's how I usually approach the house anyway…" Then there is an uncomfortable silence. Alice doesn't know what Caitlin was instructed to do at this point so she sits back, arms crossed over the helmet in her lap, watching the JLA hero thoughtfully. "Do you think he can find Kendra?"

*

Caitlin squints. The /back/ drive? The property is nothing to sneeze at then. "Okay. Gimme a minute," she says. Caitlin turns left instead of right, and heads down a side street, then up another. She glances at the GPS, and then comes to a stop, pushing the vehicle into park.

"Okay. You can roll out here and no one will see you walking," she says, looking towards Alice's stately manor.

She hesitates. "Batman gave me this. It's a subdural tracking device," she says, digging in a pocket for a little tan piece of plastic no larger than a thumbnail. "He said if you put it on your scalp under your hair, it'll conceal itself with the skin. It'll be how he tracks you and figures out where your daughter is."

She struggles to give Alice the look of a hard, confident superhero, but it's impossible to override her instinctive sympathy for Alice's plight. "Look— if anyone can find Kendra, it's Batman," she says, finally. "He's probably one of the smartest people on the planet and he doesn't ever quit. I don't /like/ him, or how he does what he does," she concedes. "But I can count on one hand the number of times someone's managed to out-maneuver him. He'll find her, if anyone can."

*

Alice searches Caitlinn's eyes with her own, which while in a young face have a feeling of ages in them. "All right," She takes the tracking device and slides it low and near her ear close to the nape of her neck. She whinces as it burrows into her skin, but nothing more before he hand drops into her lap. She stares at the helmet and her hands for a minute.
As she pops open the door she meets Catilinn's gaze again. "I hope so. I've been out of the game too long to be effective," She sighs and slides out, disappearing out of sight for a moment. That whole petite thing and big f-150s don't exactly go together. Then her helmeted heads is at the driver window, holding out a hand. "Good luck in your career. May you have more wins than losses and never lose your hope," The voice modulator is active again, making her voice seem to run through a spectrum of accents as she speaks. But those words…they're the words of someone who has been through much. The words of someone jaded by life. "I hope we don't meet again. Or if we do, let it be in a social setting," Fairchild is flashes a smile, though she can't see it.
Then she turns and begins heading at a trot back towards the driveway and the fenced countryside leading to the Walker Estate. Quickly she blends in with the evening shadows, disappearing into the night.

*

Sometimes in moments of great trauma or death, people are suffering from hallucinations or fantasy. Alice had certainly thought herself as much when she'd glimpsed the glowing and gown-wearing form of the Witchdoctor. Fortunately for her? Witches were real and Alyse was certainly no hallucination. After having been returned to the hall of Justice, the sorceress had been happy to demonstrate the second half of her 'Codename' was quite literal. This wasn't the first multiple gunshot victim she'd had to operate on and it wouldn't likely be the last. Magic and medicine made quite the potent mixture when it came to prognosis, and certainly worked better in tandem than seperate.

The worst was over, now Alice had been moved to 'Recovery' until she awoke. She wasn't 'good as new', but she was certainly far better off. The witch herself? She was wearing neither of her prefered outfits. Rather boringly perhaps, she was wearing surgical scrubs, her hair tied back atop her head as she watched the monitoring. It was more primative than her time, but function was certainly the same.

*

Alice's body was not exactly easy to work with in the surgery as about eight slugs were pulled from her shoulder, lung, spleen, and arm. The anasthesia didn't seem to last, but she remained in an odd coma anyway. Her blood pressure never dropped or changed really, and it seemed as if her body was helping clot off areas on its own as the doctor worker her brand of real and western magic.

Recovery room saw her resting easy. And it wasn't too long after she was wheeled in that her eyes fluttered. A vague moan can be heard from her as consciousness begins to take over. "Oh sweet Queen Victoria, I hate gunshots," She says, her uninjured arm lifting to rest delicately against the bandages on her left side.

*

"They are not pleasent," Alyse comments, pulling a stool nearby to the bedside and then tilting her head to the side with a smile. "I can say that much from experience. Fortunately, you should not even have a scar with my work…although one wonders if that would be the case regardless." A pause, she leans in close enough to rest her elbows on the cot-sides. "It seems you and I share more in common than just trips to this room. We are both…'interesting physiology' cases."

*

Alice peels her eyes open and turns her head. As her green eyes focus out of the anasthesia, the cobwebs clearing with a quickness no one normal has, she smiles a bit. While Alice may have cleared the haze of the anasthesia, she wasn't stupid enough to stop the pain relievers coursing through her blood. Hell, she changed them to her own formula. One that is the perfect balance for her needs. As it happens the pinched look on her face fades. "Heeeeey…You!" She says, still loopy from the demerol and morphine mix she has swirling around. "Butterfly lady…Last thing I remember was being squished by a lion while the Joker tried to make me swiss cheese…"

*

"That's about where you left off," Alyse coments, giving a little smile and shrug of her shoulders. "The Batman came and glowered at me, attempted to stabilize you. He seems not without skill, but I sent him off after the Joker before stabilizing you and bringing you here. Luck, your nature and my magic seems to have prevented any lasting damage to bones, however your ribs are going to feel quite sore among other things." A pause, she chuckles. "The Joker escaped, but the Lion is back in his cage."

*

"Oh goody. Poor kitties," Alice says with a pouty frown. "That boy in the red hood was shooting them! It wasn't their fault that ugly clown shot them full of testosterone. I sensed that when the cat fell on me before it all went fpppthhh." The very drugged woman waves her hand and makes an odd noise with her mouth and tongue. It's quite amusing on someone with such a rich and refined English accent. At least normally. Then she takes a deep breath, whincing only slightly, and she turns to look at Alyse again with a goofy grin. "I don't play damsel in distress often. But I'd rather be saved by you than Bats. He drives me fucking nuts. So stiff. He needs to get laid. Bet that's his problem." Oh yeah. Stoned.

*

"I have no idea who the man in red was, but he was certainly…trigger happy." This from the woman who'd once been described as 'Doctor Bulletwitch' by a friend teasingly. A good magician was willing to use all resources after all, but it had been a long time since she'd raised a firearm in anger now that her powers had returned. "I don't often play the white knight either, but I'm glad to be of service," the Witch says with a bow of her head before chuckling. "He was certainly rather rude, has a habbit of throwing things at me the moment he sees me in Gotham. Perhaps he has something against magic? Problems with card tricks no doubt."

*

Alice finds herself giggling before she finds herself whincing with the pain, grabbing her side even as she smiles. "Ow ow ow," She says as she gets those giggles under control. "Mmmm, but seriously, thank you. I probably would have survived, but this way I can get back to Autumn before she starts to worry," She settles back a bit into the bed and looks at the very boring hospital ceiling. "Aw fuck!" She curses and kicks one foot beneath the blankets.

*

"Autumn?" Alyse frowns, sitting herself up a little. "Friend of yours? Partner? I confess, seeking a NOK wasn't exactly on my priority list. I can find you a com-…a phone, but you should rest a little longer. You're not fit to walk yet and you require observation, even if you do recover faster than most." Folding her hands into her lap, the Witch straightens up where she sits and looks back to the monitoring. "Besides, you're still hooked up."

*

Doctors are the absolute worse patients. Doctors with rapid healing are even worse. Alice presses the button to sit her up, waving a hand dismissively at Alyse's worry. "Autumn's my daughter. I was up here for a meeting. My car got a flat and I was jumped," She says with a grunt as she adjusts herself in the bed. "Can I eat? I need to eat. It will help," Now that Alyse looks at her and she is awake there is a weird palor to Alice's skin and it seems to sag on her every so slightly. Like her body was draining reserves to feed into her healing or something. "What's a NOK? Besides something you do to a door."

*

"Next of Kin…" Alyse answers before leaning back, retrieving a small cup that seems to simply fill itself with water. "And you may have a drink first. A normal human would be on thin-fluids for quite a while after the injuries and surgery you've had. We'll see if you tolerate this, than we'll talk. I can give your daughter a call for you, if you like." The doctor herself, she reaches her free hand out, placing it on the other woman's forehead. It might almost look like she were taking her temperature or trying to, but the Witch's focus dives inwards, checking her healing with a simple diagnosis spell.

*

Alice takes the cup and eyes the water. "Nice," She says with a goofy smile before leaning back to drink. She drinks with a surprising thurst and sets the cup down with a sigh. "Part of my 'special physiology' is that my body cannabolizes itself to repair itself. When that happens my body feels like its starving. And I've actually starved before. Though I can't to death. But damn that wasn't fun," There goes the rambling again. Damned demerol. Then she blinks and frowns. "What did you ask me again?" The touch on her head finds her temperature perfect. Delving deeper her wounds have already progressed to the stage of several weeks of healing. Leaving the tissues sore, but amazingly recovered. But yet, her calores and even the fat that she had has been sucked away, leaving her body screaming for sustenance.

*

A sigh, the Witch chuckles lightly and moves towards the IV line in the other woman's arm, gently closing the flow of the fluid before disconnecting it and moving further along. "Did you wish for me to call Autumn for you?" she repeats, stretching her arms above her head. "I'll leave it to the staff that work here to discharge you. My usual setup is…more off the books than most, but these facilities are quite pleasent. I'll also notify them you are fit for food intake…they may wish for you to start with a supplement milkshake till they know there isn't a risk of non-peristalsis."

*

"Sometimes having to pretend at normal human limits is so dull. I may just AMA now that I think about it," Alice says with another sigh. "Actually, I would love that. Calling her, that is. And having you come to dinner," Then she frowns and pauses then sighs. "Maybe I will stay awhile longer and just ubereats myself something," She says with a wink and a grin. It wouldn't be long till all her information, and face health insurance, was running through the system. "But seriously, I would like you to come have dinner with me and my girl. I've had hundreds of years to perfect my cooking," A few secrets shared seems only fair, especially with the pain meds making her so talkative.

*

The concept of discharging against Medical advice has the Witch blinking, but then her patients from her time were in a little different circumstance. Still she shrugs lightly, gesturing with her hand. "Pretending is a lot of effort sometimes, more than I usually manage." Ubereats? Alyse had been in the world over a year now, but there was still plenty she hadn't wrapped her head around. Most of her food came from room service paid for with her 'Gold' trick after all. "Remain long enough to convince them I did not kidnap you, but do not worry about your bills. They are tended to." Her little trick worked on anything one could pay for with a credit card. In New York? That included a hospital visit.

*

Alice chuckles a little and scoots in the bed. "Well, thank you for that too though not needed," She says with a grin. Of course if she knew it was faerie gold fleecing the sham that was modern medicine it would likely make her absolutely gleeful. "I promise you won't show up on any apbs for kidnapping. But, I do want you to come to dinner, dear. Won't you consider it?" Alice asks, her recovery becoming more pronounced as the minutes pass. Her own body managing her pain medication even as it rapidly generates new cells and repairs damage. At this point she slowly swings her feet out towards the floor towards Alyse. "Do you have anything you don't or can't eat?"

*

"I suppose I could eat," the Witch muses lightly before reaching up to untie her hair, looking back at the other woman's bed before chuckling. "Give me your address, I will drop by and notify your daughter you will be home shortly. Perhaps you might consider 'ordering takeout' as the humans say? It might be easier for you than worrying about anything other than recovering."

*

Alice blinks and then chuckles a bit. "Well, I was thinking tomorrow. But we could do takeout tonight. It's not like it would be -that- unusual," Alice says with a bit of a chuckle. At some point she had pressed the nurse call button and now one wanders in looking surprised. "I am ready to go. Get me AMA papers please," She says in that way doctors have, knowing what they want and what needs to be done. The nurse looks absolutely phlumoxed. "But…ma'am, you're injuries…" She stammers. "And I'm a doctor. I know my body. Get me the forms." ANd out the nurse goes and Alice looks pleased, if weak. "Hah! I told her." The drugs aren't all gone after all.

*

"Tomorrow then," Alyse nods, seemingly happy with the alternative. She had been operating for quite a while, nevermind the earlier violence. "I will still notify your daughter, but I will go back to my suite and relax. There is a bubble bath with my name on it." A nod at Alice, the blonde witch takes a bow and simply disappears in a likely startling burst of butterfly lights that swiftly wink out. Elsewhere, in her hotel room, the woman reappears in her relaxed wear simply flopped on her bed, a gesture of her hand sending the tub filling. Sometimes it was good to be a Witch.

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